We took Truss to a Coldplay gig And made her wear a Brian May wig And for an even bigger lark We held that gig at Selhurst Park As Kwarteng shaved his pubic hair And ate it stir-fried for a dare While £30 billion came and went - Left Wing Economic Establishment! We threw Farage off GB News Gave vegan cyclists interviews Then nationalised the Daily Mail And stuck Lord Rothermere in jail Then, casually, and just for fun Installed Mark Thomas at the Sun And made its motto: ‘Good Intent’ - Left Wing Economic Establishment! A funny rhyme. But I, like you, Hope Truss’ vision does come true. It won’t be men in pinstriped suits But militants from the grass roots Then she will pine for former days As we in glorious landslide raise The red flag over Parliament; Left Wing Economic Establishment!

TRANS-URETHRA EXPRESS I know I sometimes can be A loud-mouthed, stroppy prat I know I'm a control freak (And a bossy one at that) My wife says when I'm eating I am a total slob - I'm still not sure that I deserved A camera up my knob Trans-Urethra Express Trans-Urethra Express The poor thing shrivelled up in fear Till it was hardly there A tiny little pimple In a nest of pubic hair The camera made its entrance The pain cut like a knife And then I saw my bladder For the first time in my life Trans-Urethra Express Trans-Urethra Express I'm glad that it went up there Though sad at what it found And it can come back anytime To help me stay around So three cheers for the NHS And for that camera crew - And if you’re feeling odd down there You get it checked out too Trans-Urethra Express Trans-Urethra Express Flexible Cystoscopy It Makes It Painful When You Pee

WAGENKNECHT Sie haben euch vergessen Sie haben euch verraten Vierunddreissig Jahre spater Habt ihr endlich was zu sagen Ihr sucht eine Bewegung Klar, sozial, direkt Auferstanden aus Ruinen - Aber Vorsicht, Wagenknecht So long you’ve been forgotten So long you’ve been betrayed Now thirty four years later There’s a statement to be made You seek a brand new movement Clear, social and direct A rising from the ruins - But be careful, Wagenknecht Sie haben nie verstanden Das war euer eigenes Land Arbeit und Brot und Obdach Das Leben fest geplannt Zusammenhalt, Gemeinschaft So lange schon vorbei Ihr habt das nie vergessen Und bleibt doch fest dabei They never understood you That this had been your land You had work and food and shelter Human needs so carefully planned A community, a society Now for so long in the past Memories still not forgotten You hold on to them so fast Ihre Treuhandanstalt-Diebstahl Hat eure Geschichte vernichtet Ihre Ellbogengesellschaft Hat euer Leben vergiftet Ihr denkt immer noch so anders Und wollt jetzt etwas Neues Eine eigene Bewegung Die sozial, gerecht und treu ist Their thief privatisations Turned your history to dust And their hard, me-first society Wrecked your lifelong sense of trust You still think in a different way And you want something new A grass roots social movement That’s yours, and fair, and true Identitat ist wichtig Aber Armut ist es auch Und Politik geht pleite Wenn man nichts hat im Bauch Also haltet jetzt zusammen Auf zum nächsten Gefecht Vierunddreissig Jahre spater - Aber Vorsicht, Wagenknecht Identity’s important But poverty is too And politics is bankrupt When you’re in a food bank queue It’s time to stand together For the battle coming next After thirty four years waiting But be careful, Wagenknecht AFD, Partei der Bonzen Sie fuhren euch hinters Licht Wie Kohl, nur Quatsch und Lüge Solche Leute braucht ihr nicht Ihr sucht ja etwas Neues Inklusiv, voller Respekt Also baut euch jetzt die Zukunft - Aber vorsicht, Wagenknecht AFD’s a bosses’ party Profit vultures on the make Just like Kohl, all lies and nonsense You don’t need them, they’re just fake You’re seeking a new movement Inclusive and with respect So go on and build the future - But be careful, Wagenknecht Einheitspartei zu bauen Meint alles gut verstanden Kein Kompromiss mit Rechten Fremdenhass fur niemanden Volker hor die Signale Ich sag es ganz direkt Kein Platz fur Nationalismus Und vorsicht, Wagenknecht To forge a brand new party It must be understood No deals done with the right wing A common brotherhood Then comrades come rally - My words are quite direct No place for nationalism Be careful, Wagenknecht